The Difficult Client
Occasionally you may return from a meeting with a client, close your door and plot sweet revenge for all the pain they have caused you. Fortunately for most lawyers this isn't a regular occurrence. When it does happen, here are a few things to think about.
WHY DO SOME CLIENTS HAVE THIS AGGRAVATING EFFECT?
The client was born difficult. The client became difficult.
Yes, some clients have a personality problem or other significant shortcoming but most often, the difficult client gets out of hand because of poorly managed interpersonal relations with their lawyer. You may not be able to identify what sets your client on the path to being difficult, but it is important to be able to identify what you can do to diffuse an aggravating situation before it goes from bad to worse.
Styles of Relating
Once you start rubbing each other the wrong way it may be too late to salvage the relationship. Take the time early on to figure out what kind of style your client has and how to best deal with them.
CAST OF CHARACTERS
According to Tony Alessandra and Michael J O'Connor, authors of Discover the Four Basic Business Personalities - and How They Can Lead You to Success, the key to eliminating (or at least minimizing) the aggravation from difficult clients is to understand and adjust to their preferences. The benefit of using these profiles is to understand how your style interacts with that of the client so that you can minimize differences and facilitate better communication and faster decision-making. Of course, these descriptions are by nature generalities but they may help you find a better way to deal with your particular difficult client. Take your best guess about which category your nerve-racking client fits into and act accordingly.
The Director
This person is outgoing and commanding with an emphasis on "lets get the job done."
They are good decision makers and love competition - if they believe they are going to win. They want to know what you think, but may choose the opposite of your recommendation while still believing in your expertise. They need to appear in charge.
The Socializer
The socializer is outspoken and gregarious. They are idea people but need others to carry out their plans while they think up more. They say things like "but what about this option" to test their own idea generating limits but are sometimes perceived as indecisive or negative. They see meetings as both a social and business event.
These two personality types are generally willing to take greater risks than the "Relater" or the "Thinker."
The Relator
If there is a conflict, the relater is the first person to suggest a compromise. They are good listeners and often seem like great team players. If they perceive conflict they will either give in or clam up. They will get along just great with everyone in your office and your colleagues will question how you could possibly consider them a difficult client.
The Thinker
This is the person who actually liked doing research in school and still seeks knowledge, often working alone analyzing problems and doing lots of research. This person may say they will leave decisions up to you and then go and research and analyze the problem themselves and come back with solutions on their own, sometimes after you have already taken action. They can sometimes be perceived as questioning authority when in fact they are just gathering information.
Both the "Relater" and the "Thinker" are clients who have little tolerance for taking risks and tend to make decisions only after time-consuming and tedious discussions about the often-extraneous facts and minutiae of a case.
WHAT YOU CAN DO
The following illustrates some of the things you can do to improve your relationships with these personality types.
Director
The "Director" is a fast-paced, big-picture person, not primarily concerned with the impact of decisions on others. They hate the details that sometimes must be comprehended in order to set a viable plan or strategy and, in most instances, they want nothing short of a clear-cut victory.
Stress your own organizational and big picture skills by saying,"Well go ahead and get started on Plan A right away." Support the "Director's" ideas but if you disagree, back yourself up with fact.
Don't beat around the bush - this client will get frustrated at even the hint of you wasting their time. The "Director" is easily annoyed by unmotivated or weak people so never let them know you are upset.
Never compete with them if this also is your own personality style.
Socializer
The "Socializers" are quick decision-makers and do not mind risk either, but they want everything to be "win-win," hoping never to be thought of as overreaching or sharp. Lay out a number of alternatives that reduce the chance of them being perceived by others in a bad light. Rework and include their own suggestions when providing options.
Be upbeat when this client presents their suggestions and learn to tolerate their digressions in your meetings - that's when they come up with some of their best ideas.
The "Socializer" is definitely a big picture person and gets bogged down with details - so spare them and limit details only to the "need to know" variety.
Also, make sure you invite this client to parties and firm events - they need to feel like they are on your "A" list.
Never rush this person out of a meeting or back on point if they digress.
Relator
The "Relater" is a seemingly accommodating, low-pressure type. Such clients dote on small, sometimes irrelevant facts, but are also concerned with the effects of their decisions on other people -- they do not want to ruffle any feathers (including those of the other side) in making decisions. In your negotiations with a "Relater" slow down and focus on the benefits to them and people on their side.
Give this client time to trust you. Keep them up-to-date on how the file is going, even when minimal action is being taken. They need the details. Talk about your "gut" feelings when discussing strategy.
Don't expect this client to make decisions on their own. Allow them time to consult others that they trust, including family and friends.
Don't put this client on the spot in meetings with yourself or others.
Don't shrug off this client's concern - it may be a trust test.
Thinker
The "Thinker" is methodical and fact-oriented. When negotiating with them, stick to business and use lots of details to demonstrate the logic of your proposals and strategy. Make the client feel comfortable with the course of action you're recommending. If you don't take the time to do this, you'll probably be met with endless delay. You might get a barrage of client responses like: "I need more information on ... "or " Tell me how many other times you have used this proposed strategy, and tell me everything that could go wrong."
Be consistent and detail oriented to show your commitment to their file. Make sure your staff also show this consistency. Give this client a list of pros and cons when making suggestions.
Don't let this client feel they are "doing all the work" - keep detailed records of meetings and phone conversation and refer to your notes when following up. "As we discussed on the phone last Thursday at 2PM."
Don't fail "fact" tests - this client will regularly test you on your grasp of the "facts" as the client perceives them. Don't dismiss their facts as "irrelevant" or not true.
YOUR TYPE
Find yourself in the above list and remember that when dealing with a business style different than your own, expecting them to accept your style will just result in conflict and difficulty. Instead, try to understand and relate to their preferred business style. Once you meet with a client you can head off some of the potential problems by generating alternative plans and actions based on their preferred business style. It may take more effort from you but the return on the investment is well worth it.
Your Influence on the Difficult Client Of course, if you've had an argument with your spouse, been stuck in traffic or somehow missed a delivery date for some documents, there's always one more option for why that client is being difficult - you. Look at yourself before you blame others.
CONFLICT AND CLOSURE
If your relationship has already veered off course, remember that you cannot change your clients or the way they relate to you. Instead, focus on improving your conflict resolution skills and involving the client in the disarmament process. Consider the following responses, with sincerity and NO tone.
"You must have a reason for saying that (objection). Would you tell me more?"
"I'm unclear why you are saying that; tell me more."
"If I were to do what you are asking (paint the full, inequitable picture), what would my (partner, opposing counsel, the court) think of this? In fact, Mr. Client, what would you do in my shoes?"
Most inherently reasonable clients will accept these attempts at reconciliation and make an effort to respond considerately. And for those that don't - the born difficult - you may just have to let it go.